My Perspective of the Candidates So Far...the Long Version!

OK, now that I got my grandfather's soapbox cleaned and primed for the 2008 Presidential election and all of my "Mondale for Me in '84" and "Dukakis for President '88" stickers have finally been peeled off of it, let me give you what I have gathered in the race so far, at least about the candidates.

NelsOnline's views and perceptions of the three major candidates of each party, starting with the Republicans.

Mitt Romney: With his second-place showing in Iowa to the Chuck Norris and apparently God-backed Mike Huckabee and his second-place finish in NH to the oldest "comeback kid" I have ever seen, Sen. John McCain; the former Massachusetts governor can at least rest assured that he is number one with the delegates of Wyoming, winning that state's Republican primary and getting eight out of a total of fourteen delegates.

Of course, this is the same state where Rep. Duncan Hunter actually placed third in the same primary, garnering 1 (one) delegate. Despite this 1 win and 2 loss record so far, I feel that unless Giuliani comes out of hiding sometime soon and does something or if Hunter, Ron Paul and even Fred Thompson actually become viable Republican competitors overnight, Mitt Romney is still the front runner for the Republican presidential nod, despite what certain polls say; but only just barely. He might be tripped up in the south, where his Mormon faith might clash with the voters of the "Bible Belt," which will be very beneficial to Mike Huckabee if Huckabee is cagey enough to press his advantage here, and believe me, Mike will. The Michigan Republican primary on January 15th, unlike our Democratic primary, will be interesting to see as it will be Romney v. Huckabee, with McCain making a strong showing. He's gotta try to do something with that personality of his as well. I try not to insult people without having just cause, but the man has as much personality as a used paint can. Come on Mitt, liven it up a little, huh?

Mike Huckabee: With a name like Huckabee, how can one lose? And to prove this point, ol' Huck pulled the Iowa Republican primary out from Mitt Romney's feet (not to mention Romney's beautifully sculpted hair.) Even before this, Huckabee showed his Hollywood star-drawing power by getting the endorsement of "Walker, Texas Ranger" star Chuck Norris, which should garner the USA Network vote for the former pastor. He also has athletes campaigning for him as well, if one counts pro wrestling as an athletic sport, in the person of WWE superstar Ric Flair. I am so sure that candidates were lined up for blocks to get the endorsement of a popular (yet saggy) pro wrestler and the main character from the "Missing in Action" and "Delta Force" movies.

Yet even with these two personages pulling for him in this election cycle, Huckabee still has some major Republican primaries to win and a lot of people to win over in order for him to cement his chances for the Republican presidential nomination. Perhaps actually having a foreign policy plan would help! As I see it though, he must use the momentum he got by winning the Iowa Republican primary and offset McCain's hard-fought win in NH with wins or very strong showings in the upcoming primaries, Michigan for starters, to have any chance of defeating Romney overall. He can best do this by winning primaries in the region where he seemingly has a decided advantage, the south. Decisive wins here, especially in South Carolina's Republican primary and the Republican primaries encompassing the already-mentioned "Bible Belt," may bolster his chances in primaries elsewhere where he might not have much chance of winning, thereby facilitating a steamrolling effect to the Republican nomination and upsetting Romney's chances for the nomination. If he cannot do this, even with the highly-coveted Chuck Norris and Ric Flair endorsements, it is curtains for his campaign.

Sen. John McCain (R-AZ): Is it just me or is John McCain getting more and more pale every time I see him on Meet the Press? You would think that since he represents Arizona in the Senate, he would have a better tan. Notwithstanding this, McCain resurrected his practically-dead campaign with a strong win in NH this past week. Could this be a revitalization of McCain's dim prospects for the Republican presidential nomination? Hardly! As we were speaking of endorsements earlier in reference to Huckabee, did you hear about Sen. Joe Lieberman's (I-CT) endorsement of his fellow senator for president? This bit of news stunned me somewhat and dropped Lieberman a few pegs down on my popularity ladder (honestly, he wasn't all that high up anyway.)

Why do I say hardly when referring to McCain's chances for the Republican presidential nod? Well, he has lost his "maverick" persona in minds of many Americans since his run for the presidency in 2000. The reasoning behind this is because over the course of the previous seven years of the militarized "Howdy Doody Show" that has become the George W. Bush presidency, McCain seemingly could not lance his lips from the hindquarters of his onetime presidential opponent enough to maintain his "maverick" status. Even on issues where McCain had some doubts, he was behind Bush II almost all the time. This will become an assured hindrance in the coming primaries.

What McCain needs to do in the coming weeks to win more is to distance himself from the policies of Bush II and regain his lost "maverick" status again, thereby increasing his chances for important Republican primary wins. McCain must utilize his built-in clout with veterans by coming up with fresher ideas pertaining to the War in Iraq and veterans care. He must also court and garner crucial votes from younger voters as well as well as padding his popularity amongst older voters. If unsuccessful in any of these, no amount of Ensure, Centrum Silver, Ben-Gay, or old episodes of Matlock will help McCain win any future Republican primaries, much less the Republican presidential nod itself.

...and to not leave anyone out, the rest of the Republican hopefuls, in short:

Fred Thompson: Keep telling people that you are the outsider...and that you were on "Law and Order"...and that you played the air traffic controller in "Die Hard II." You'll win at least two more votes, that of "Law and Order" alum Sam Waterston and "Die Hard" mainstay Bruce Willis...well, maybe.

Rep. Ron Paul (R-TX): The "YouTube Guru" of the 2008 Republican presidential race. You have raised considerable amounts of money on the Internet and attracted younger voters in spades as a result of your admittedly fresh use of the World Wide Web in your campaign, yet you really haven't had much of a strong primary showing anywhere to show for it. Granted, as of this blogs posting, 12 January 2008, you have 2 delegates...yet, is there a chance you might get into double digits delegate-wise? Say 11 or 12? Possibly more?

Rudy Giuliani: Whoa...where did you go? You were here a minute ago! Weren't you the Presidential front-runner of the Republicans not that long ago? What happened Rudy? Did I just miss you or are you in a cave somewhere fashioning a new message apart from the whole "I was mayor of NYC during 9/11" shtick? Oh that's right, you are hedging your bets in Florida because as you know "as Florida goes, so goes the nation." The last time that happened, Americans sadly were able to complete that phrase to include "as Florida goes, so goes the nation...right down the toilet!"

Rep. Duncan Hunter (R-CA): You would think that having Brig. Gen. Chuck "Sound Barrier-breaker" Yeager as the "honorary" chairman of your campaign would help win you some delegates by now. But according to the delegate tally (one) that does not seem to be proving out for you. Of course, making several rather controversial statements over the past few months of your campaign does not help too much either.

That ends the Republicans...now for the Democratic Party's Presidential candidates...the sweetest smelling and sharpest dressed group of candidates in the world.

Barack Obama (D-IL): I like Barack Obama for many different reasons. He is incredibly dynamic and has a youthful spirit that I dare say we haven't had in a presidential election for quite some time. Obama is articulate and extraordinarily intelligent and surprisingly savvy to boot. He does not use his skin color as a crutch but rather as an effective weapon, perhaps one that will ultimately lead him to the White House. As a true blue Democrat, I feel that any Democrat...heck, any four-slice toaster, would be better at the presidency than George W. "pretzel-choker" Bush is now.

In my view, what Barack needs to do to solidify his presidential nomination is to really reach out to the black vote. Not only to the black vote but to other minority groups as well, including women. Obama must press the youth vote even more, which seems to be working well with a few of my Democratic chums here at CMU. Yet, he must also defeat the notion that his inexperience in certain matters would be a liability as President and/or people's misconceptions pertaining to race issues, which I feel he will clear up convincingly whether he wins the nomination or not. Winning in Iowa really galvanized his campaign and terribly shook the longtime Democratic front-runner, Sen. Hillary Clinton (D-NY,) who promptly countered Obama by winning a hard fought primary in NH. For Obama to win the nomination, he must win or have very strong showings during "Super Duper Tuesday," February 5, 2008. As with all of the candidates in the 2008 Presidential Election, this day will make and break campaigns. After this day, I feel that the race will be truly on. The stragglers will be cut and we shall be left with the final four, as it were, for better or for worse. Obama will survive and become one of the four left.

Sen. Hillary Clinton (D-NY): I would vote for the pantsuit-clad Hillary Clinton if it meant we had Bill Clinton back in the White House, and since they are married for better or for worse, this would happen. Bill would be the first ex-president to return to the White House as a spouse of a president and consequently, the first man to be "First Gentleman" of the land. I can see it now: Bill redecorating the White House to include Budweiser mirrors and commemorative plates featuring the "Legends of NASCAR" on the mantle. Seriously though, Sen. Clinton is also a strong, dynamic and savvy politician in her own right and has perhaps all the experience one needs to be president. Yet this may be a hindrance to her campaign as well...maybe she's too qualified (as opposed to George W. Bush who's qualifications include being an officer in the TX Air National Guard and a male cheerleader in college.)

Hillary, for her to win and have people vote for her must assuredly increase her energies and press her advantage as the perceived "front-runner." Don't let Obama, or more distantly, Fmr. Sen. John Edwards gain any ground on you. "Keep on, keepin' on" as Gladys Knight would say. Hillary Clinton is probably going to be the hardest working presidential candidate in American presidential election history. She must go out to as many county fairs, coffee shops, quilting bees, spelling bees, police barbecues, and inundate the press with her presence at every turn, delivering her message in between. She must give the press her schedule and with cameras rolling, prepare to kiss every baby, smile at every schoolchild, cry at appropriate emotional times, laugh at bad jokes, clap at the necessary times, and swallow down local delicacies she wouldn't give her dog. She must not let up, period! As a matter of fact, I would advise this to all of the candidates, not just Clinton. They must want the presidency and project that need to the voters, Hillary included. Hillary will be there, too.

Fmr. Sen. John Edwards (D-NC): I was indeed surprised to see that Edwards received second place in Iowa, but as I looked at it, it was rather appropriate. Edwards comes from the heartland of the south and Iowa lies at the heartland of the Midwest. There is a kind of a kinship there...and it also helps to campaign practically everywhere in Iowa before the primary date, not just here and there. He actually made the effort to go out to the voters and become acquainted with the electorate, not just meet and greets. Out of all of the candidates in this election, he has the rare "personal touch" that voters have not had for years out of a presidential candidate. He also, with the revelation of his wife's fight w/ cancer, did not drop out or blink an eye and continued campaigning, garnering America's sympathy vote, yet sympathy votes do not win elections, actual votes do.

For Edwards to win the nomination, both Obama and Clinton have to have near-fatal campaign disasters for Edwards to have a great shot at the Democratic nomination, or, lacking this, victories in SC and a miraculous showing on Super Duper Tuesday to even have a chance at the nod. Like Clinton, he must make himself seen at as many places as humanly possible in key primary states. Like Obama, he must also shake off the inexperience mantle and prove to voters that he has what it takes to win and be our nation's fourty-fourth president. Edwards might be there after Super Tuesday. Consider him a "dark horse" in this campaign.

and the rest of the Democratic hopefuls...well, at least whoever is left!

Farewell to Gov. Bill Richardson of New Mexico, and Senators Joe Biden and Chris Dodd. We have some lovely parting gifts and just for running...we have perhaps some cabinet chairs opening up for you in the near future, so keep tabs on that.

Note: Somehow, we're going to have to find some way to discern Joe Biden from Chris Dodd and vice versa.

Rep. Dennis Kucinich (D-OH): What can I say about Dennis Kucinich. I like him a lot. His peace plan seems a valid one. But there are just sometimes where I just want to say to Rep. Kucinich "I like you ...but you are kind of peeing against the tide in this election." Sometimes you gotta know when to stop and start packing away for 2012...but I'll say this for him...he's determined...at least for now.

Fmr. Sen. Mike Gravel (D-AK): I can honestly say this about Mike Gravel...I do not know a thing about Mike Gravel apart from his role in the "Pentagon Papers" controversy in the early 1970's. Yes, I have read his positions on various topics, but as he's been out of the public spotlight since, well, before I was born (1981,) it's hard to really be for him. He seems to be a nice enough fellow, but like I said, I just don't know him well enough apart from the historical aspect of him to formulate a like or dislike. But, in defense of Gravel, I like Wikipedia's pic of Gravel more than I do CNN's pic of him. Not much of a defense, granted, but nonetheless, a defense.

I apologize for the length of this blog. I promise that in the future, I shall be concise and relatively normal-sized from now on. So until next week, or, if something irks me enough to write about it sooner, I wish you a very Democratic day.

NelsOnline.